By The Wellbeing Warrior Woman
Are you stuck in a repetitive cycle of always putting others first, and dropping everything to react to the requests of family, friends and colleagues, then never quite getting all your own needs fulfilled or tasks completed?
For many years, this was me. My nature is to be kind, and help others, and , don’t get me wrong it’s a good, and noble thing to do, but it can be tiring, frustrating and sometimes disrespectful. Setting and sustaining boundaries is an essential skill if you want to have more balance in your life and relationships, and the best way to do this is to put on your own oxygen mask and life jacket, before helping the passenger next to you with theirs.
It’s not being selfish, it’s being self -full, and making sure we are able to operate at our best, most of the time.
Yes, it makes you feel guilty at first, saying NO to people that you are already conditioned to say yes to, but it doesn’t have to be a No, I’m never going to do that for you, it can be a No, I can’t do that right at this very moment, or when you want it done by, but I can do it then. Of course we need to use some appropriate prioritisation, but it is very unlikely that their request will actually be a matter of life or death after all.
Once you recognize your need to enforce and set limits with your time and energy, you regain self- respect, protect your peace of mind and enjoy the healthy relationships you have, so having boundaries let’s everyone know and understand your parameters and maintains equilibrium for everyone.